Emerald Rose
by tush14
Summary: Bucky was having a horrid time controlling the memories that seemed to spew out at the worst given time. Lately all his senses would trigger glimpses of the last 70 years. in specific a woman with a tattooed black key hole at the nape at her neck and a shield agent he killed under Hydra. Now he just has to put the pieces together to find out what the puzzle means.
1. Chapter 1

Bucky was having a horrid time controlling the memories that seemed to spew out at the worst given time. Lately all his senses would trigger glimpses of the last 70 years and in the past few days his memory seems to be on repeat of a women with a black key hole tattooed at the nape of her neck.

At the same time he keeps reliving a meeting with a former Shield agent back in 1943 whom he killed during his time as the Winter Soldier.

Now he has to accompany Steve to a annual Winter Gala to help write his wrongs and promote unity as the Avengers accept new recruits. In particularly one who he can't shake off the feeling of knowing her before

...

Authors notes:

Ok guys, so this is my first fanfiction, I'm gonna see if I'm any good at this and at the same time I'm learning about the app so please be kind to me lol!

Any feedback is welcome and constructive criticism is appreciated as well..

Hope you giys enjoy!

DISCLAIMER:

I don't own any of the marvel characters, only the fictional characters I made up as well as the story line ;) otherwise all credit goes to Stan Lee and Marvel.

Tashii A.A


	2. What an entrance

The suit wasn't the problem, it was the fact that he had to shave his stubble and be forced into a gentleman's hair cut, that he was finding difficult to let his temper go. Although he had refused to attend or be involved with the prancing around, Steve made it clear that this was one event he couldn't afford to skip.

His attendance would be seen to the world, as his way of trying to write his wrongs from his past. Although he had yet to contemplate the word acceptance, he was having an excruciating time trying to control the memories that wanted out of his perfectly happy blockage of his past. The few memories that would escape only made it clear the revolting monster he had become. All the faces, the feel of their pulse slowing beneath his palm as he constructed their airway, or the sharp Crack of their spinal cord being forced in a direction that would break their necks.

All his senses held a weight of a different story of the missions he had accomplished, few were from his childhood or early adult life. Most, however, we're from his brutal massacre throughout the past 70 years. This was the reason Steve was currently camping outside his door every night. Apparently the inhabitants in the three floors above him were having difficulty sleeping through his random shouts in different languages and the screams of torture that plagued him. Steve in all his heroic glory would stride in and help ease the pain, but it only helped for so long before Steve began to feel insomniac as well.

Therefore when the day arrived for the Winter Gala, the last thing that Bucky wanted to do, was get dolled up and go spend the night mingling. Steve on the other hand was ecstatic to take Bucky out and show him how the world had changed.

"This will be good for you Buck! A new look, new suit, new-"

"New attitude. I know, you keep repeating the same thing. I don't know Steve, it's just, too soon." Bucky turned away from his friend and caught a glimpse of his new hair cut and let out a sigh of defeat.

"Don't think on it too much, let go of the past for tonight. Tomorrow we'll wallow. But right now, think of yourself as Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes. The ladies man" Steve gave a bright wink that made Bucky chuckle with good humor. He had been a ladies man, over 50 years ago, now he was just an old man with a young man's body.

"Come on Buck, I'll be there with you in case of anything. Just.. give it a try. I'm sure there's a good girl with impecable taste at the gala. Just try." And with that speech and a good clap on the back both friends were out the door and ready to make an entrance.


	3. Brotherly love

The light was a little too bright for Katarina's liking, and the ridiculous headache she fashioned wasn't helping her mood. She half turned in the mirror to catch a glimpse of her exposed back. The cut of the dress was exquisite and the dangerously low cut back left nothing to the imagination. Katarina turned again towards the front to smooth over the tight fabric that clung her upper body and re examined the off-the-shoulder silver sequence that covered her cleavage.

The emerald dress was much more clingy then any other dress she had tried on that same evening. But this dress screamed elegance and class which was what she wanted to portray and nothing less then that. Although once she caught sight of the price tag she had given up hope completely for the gala. That was until her twin brother had rudely entered the dressing room to see her.

All it had taken was one look for Milenko to examine the fabric and suggest that all it needed was for a mid thigh cut to allow her more leg space, for him to leave. Soon after a seamstress was thrown into the dressing room and she began to make a cut and expose her entire right leg.

After having the floor length dress altered, Milenko hauled her off to an appointment with his personal hair stylist. After which her personal grooming increased with Milenko hovering over everyone's shoulder and giving off instructions as to how he wanted every small detail.

Katarina on the other hand was beginning to feel less like a sister and more like Milenko's projects.

Her frown depend further when Milenko insisted that she take a nap and eat as little as possible when they arrived home. Which was the exact opposite if what she wanted, her senses already heighten by her nerves for the impending gala. She was hoping for some time with sharpening her knifes before getting ready. But Milenko 'insisted'.

Tonight was to be a crucial turning point for her, and she felt the pressure of being introduced officially as a new Avenger. She kept replaying all the different ways tonight's questioner would go, as she met her new team mates. The problem which worried her most was the never ending questions of her past to better acquaint themselves with her.

A past she was still trying to discover, her memories were being slow to make themselves known. She had been able to tap into a few memories of her childhood and fewer glimpses of objects or surroundings that she had seen. After discovering that she wasn't who she believed to be, and after a few episodes of her blacking out in the most random moments, Katarina began a time table with the small amount of information she held.

Milenko on the other hand, had no interest in finding out what happened to him, he repressed his memory and became rigid towards many things, including Katarina. He outright refused to be of any help to the Avengers, but had instead on being nearby his twin in case she needed him.

That is how Milenko became Katarina's unofficial geooming manager, one who at that moment, Katarina wanted gone for a few hours.

A small rapt to her door brought Katarina out of her reflection in the mirror and focused on Milenko's impecable grey suit with his emerald pocket square, his only color contrast.

"You look breath taking nena. I'm proud to see you look so stunning, and I'm proud to say that again, I was right." Milenko chuckled as he stepped closer and lifted his pant suit to bend down and help put Katarina's silver heels on.

"Ever the humble man brother. I did pick the shoes-"

"Heels."

"-heels at least, and the great thing about them is I can manage to run a few yards before breaking them completely. It also works if I need to stab someone." She choked the last words out as she tried to contain the chuckle that wanted to burst. Milenko kept working as if not having paid any attention to her. Once the heels were strapped and he stood, did she see a ghost of a smirk on his tan face.

"Nena please tell me your not loaded. Not tonight of all nights." His smirk wavering for a moment before she anticipated his knife at her throat, only to have her respond with quick reflexes and point a 9mm to his crotch.

"Mierda!" Was all that Katarina said as she tucked her gun away into her left thigh holster as Milenko sheathed his knife into his breast pocket.

"Ladies don't swear, and they also don't take guns to a gala Nena."

"I never said I was a lady, besides, I feel safer with them close to me." Katarina said as she challenged Milenko to contradict her. He knew that no matter how hard he tried to repress his memories, he was still aware of the assassin he hid. What made matters worse, was having to share that burden with Katarina.

"Milo I know your aware of more of our past then you let on. These projects are just to help you cope because you keep supressing the truth. But I do not. I know I've killed. Simply because I cannot remember, doesn't mean I haven't acknowledge it cariño."

Katarina stretched her arms out to let him know that she was going to embrace him. That she was alright with his decision and that her love for her brother had not faltered. Too many times Katarina had done this, and experience had shown her that she needed her brother to acknowledge an embrace before giving him one. Otherwise Milo would forget himself and lung towards her throat before realizing she was no threat. The reflexes where still imprinted inside him, no amount of tailored suits and grooming would conceal it.

Milo said nothing, but the small nod gave her the confidence to embrace her brother, and as quickly as it happened, so quickly the embrace finished. He straightened his suit jacket, and reached out to help let loose a strand of curly, black hair that was coming undone by the many pins Katarina's head held. After a quick sigh he lifted her hand and tucked it under the crook of his right elbow.

"Let's go Nena, before they send the Avengers out to get you." Milenko whispered before tapping her hand and leading her out of the building. Katarina's headache began to fade just a bit.


	4. Neurokinesis

The private elevator that was handled by security personal gave no comfort to her all burning nerves at all as Katrina held onto her coat a little tighter. A small memory suddenly came into view.

Her body ached, she could feel her nerves, she was aware of her entire nervous system and the feeling was strange to say the least. Something was wrong, her stomach dropped as she felt her brother nearby. They had gone out to a party that was being thrown in honor of all the men that would soon join the war. Spain had announced their involvement to help an ally, anywhere you walked the streets buzzed with the sound of war.

Milenko.

Milo came home that afternoon, told her he had signed and was heading out tomorrow morning. Katarina hadn't liked the idea, she could feel the dread crawling up her skin. Her twin was going to be shipped to fight a battle that wasn't his, but convincing him of that was useless.

That night they had gone to celebrate, but something happened. She couldn't remmeber. Katarina tried to conjure another memory, but nothing came. Nothing about her childhood in Madrid, nothing about her mother, did she even have one? Or a father?

"Milo?" Her voice hurt, as if she hadn't used her vocal cords in a while. Katarina heard footsteps, the door opened and suddenly people were shouting. There wasn't a female in the room, they all sounded like men, she felt their fear, their nerves. They weren't speaking spanish, it was a much rougher language. German? Maybe Russian, but Spain didn't have their kind, especially not in Madrid.

Something was wrong and somehow, it was about to get worse.

She opened her eyes and tried to sit up.

"Milo! Donde estas? Tengo miedo. Milo!"

Everything ached but her fear was escalating quickly, she felt as if her nerves were burning, as if a fire had been created inside her and it was being fanned to expand more.

Before she knew it, she felt as though an explosion had happened inside of her, in her core. Suddenly every person in the room had collapsed onto the floor. Some clutching to their ears, others their eyes. Blood had began to spill through their pores and they started to convulse on the ground. Blankets, pillows, IV's and bags were floating above her.

Katarina's fear only increased from there, she needed to get out. It wasn't safe, monitors began to crackle and the electricity in the air was sparking. She began to stand on the bed when she felt a pinch to her buttocks. Fear, she felt more fear.

Then, everything went dark.

Katarina felt a hand on her shoulder and the elevator light flickered.

"Kata aquí estoy, estas bien. Relájate.. insisto."

She felt herself immediately relax, his Empathy power settling over her nerves. She usually didn't like being forced to feel, or do things by him but in this case, she was overly grateful.

"I'm sorry Milo, I remembered something. Todo.. todo esta bien?"

Milenko only gave a slight nod and pulled her in closer as the doors opened to the top of the One World Observatory tower.

Everything was made of glass and the view was beautiful. They stepped out of the elevator to be stopped by another security guard who asked to see their invitation. A burgandy clad covered bell hop approached her for her coat, she quietly withdrew from her warmth and confortable space, allowing the fresh air swiftly hitting her back. The observatory was filled with so many different people, her eye caught a glimpse of a tall man with long blond hair whom looked familiar, perhaps someone from her hidden past.

"Ma'am I will need to see the inside of your left wrist please." The security guard held his hand out and waited for Katarina to extend her wrist. When the guard noticed she didn't intend to move and simply lifted a perfectly black eyebrow, did his stance sway a bit and he retracted his hand.

"It's for security measure. I just need to confirm you aren't the suspect we were told to watch out for. If you don't have any ink there, we're clear." Again the guard extended his hand to her, only Katarina lifted

her wrist to his eye level.

The security nodded after contemplating that that would be as much as he would get out of her, then turned to see the man next to her do the same.

Once both had passed the security guard Milo lead her by the back through the tight space of the Observatory, on path to find their table which was closest to the balcony.

"Nena are you alright? What did you see?" Milo had asked in a quiet voice, almost as if the words caused him dread.

"Us, well, sort of. I remember waking up with the Neurokinesis. Some men were in a room that looked similar to the labs they test rats in, the ones in IL Muro Campo. I was on the bed trying to remember how I got there. You had come home Milo, telling me you were joining the war. You were leaving the next day and Madrid was holding a celebration for those who joined. That's all. Well, and I suppose I damaged the men in the room, they spoke in russian. I'm sure it was russian, they started to bleed on the floor, it's was horrible." Katarina explained, her back stiffening. Milo simple patted her back in a small demonstration of comfort. His empathetic power surging to the surface, he was about to give his sister a calming feeling when he heard his name boom over the chatter.

"Milenko Cavallero!"

Katarina turned towards her brother to see that he had also turned towards the sound of his name. A dark man with a peculiar patch covering his left eye walked towards them. He hesitated after seeing Katarina, but quickly recover and clapped Milenko on the back with a small grin on his face, one that looked a little forced.

"It's good to see you my friend, it has been too long. I see you brought your beautiful sister with you. Miss Cavallero. It's a pleasure to meet you in person."

"The pleasure is mine, señor..."

"Ahh Fury. Nick Fury. Milenko your tables this way, follow me."

Both were lead quickly to their destination which was not that far from their reach. Once they both sat down a red headed woman appeared to Fury's left and took the chair out to gracefully sit, crossing her right leg over the left. Her hair was pinned to the side and she wore a tight gold dress that landed below her knees. Giving Milo an unwanted distraction, his eyes settled on the women's legs a little too long before Fury began to speak again.

"Milenko, Katarina, this is one of Shields top agents, she also works with the Avengers closely. Natasha Romanoff, this is our new recruit Katarina Cavallero and her brother, who refuses to join, Milenko Cavallero."

Natasha shook both of their hands and sat back to observe, purposely making her dress hitch higher on her thighs and watched with satisfaction as Milo's gaze kept drifting back to her legs. After ordering something to drink for all of them, Fury began to talk to Milenko, trying again to slowly warm the idea of having him join the Avengers. Katarina on the other hand began to watch for the person who took their drink order to come back.

"Psst, Katarina." She turned around to see that Natasha was looking amused at her.

"Let's leave the boys to talk, I'll introduce you to the team." Natasha whispered loudly and stood up to collect her.

"Can I call you Nina? Katarina sounds so long and formal. You look more of a Nina to me." Katarina chuckled and nodded.

"I've been called Nina for as long as I can remember, it's not a problem with me. Do you go by anything other then Natasha or Black widow?"

Katarina saw the corner of her new acquaintances mouth twitch slightly. Natasha reached for Katarina's right arm and only patted her hands.

"Most call me Nat. I prefer that to anything else really. Nothing special. I like things simple and to the point. No beating round the bush is the saying here darling." Her laugh rang throughout the chitter as she lead them to the balcony which seemed crowded as well. It was snowing outside and although the balcony was opened to the public, it was also shut in from the cold. The removable glass windows that seperated them from the otside were shut tightly. Normally those would be lifted above the balcony to give more roofing, but in the January cold night, they were kept locked. Allowing the balcony to be a secluded glass room, which Katarina soon found out, was also sound proof. Soft music was being emitted through the floor and Katarina found the room to be much more warm then what she expected.

Three men approach them as soon as they entered. One was about Natashas height, perhaps a bit smaller and his black and white suit was simple. He carried himself in a relaxed manner and had a serious look about himself, but his gait showed him to be quite the goofball. The other man was tall and bulky, and Katarina knew him right away as Captain America, the red, white and blue tie didn't help conceal his identity either. He was easy to identify, as well as the man that stayed behind who was on his phone and had odd looking glasses, but, the man that stood next to Steve Rogers was odd. He seemed more detached, there was a chill about him that reminded Katarina of a frosted Russian winter.

"Hey boys, I found our new recruit, this is Katarina Cavallero. We can call her Nina, she's sweet." Natasha said as the boys settled in front of them. "Nina this is Clint Barton, also a shield agent. Tall glass of blond water here is Steve Rogers, back there on his phone is Tony Stark, and the beautiful dark haired girl arguing is Wanda, youll love her. And this brooding super soldier who looks like he doesn't want to be here is James Buchanan Barnes, but you can call him Bucky."


	5. Blessed Death

"Don't worry Sergeant, the glass was made to hold more then six super soldiers together. It won't break, and if it does, that metal arm will certainly come in handy." Tony teased as Bucky came into the glass balcony with a pale face.

"I don't enjoy heights. That's all." Bucky had refused to go out, but Steve had teased him as well and after a few drinks to help calm his anxiety for heights. He stepped out and couldn't refuse how beautiful it looked. The snow falling slowly down onto the windows and the busy street below. He had been dreading the event for a while and although Steve constantly gave him courage, Bucky was afraid of any threat that would make things worse for him. Once he stepped out of the elevator he was hit with memories after memories of different places with windows, and snow. It took him a good half hour and a few trips to the bartender to calm himself and deal with the memories.

Now he found himself quietly enjoy the view, there was a stillness in him at seeing the snow fall. Instantaneously his view was slowly fading and his peripherals were becoming darker. His sense began to dull, it felt as if time was slowing, each snowflake was suspended in air, his pulse was in his ears. He was about to have an episode of memories, a lengthy one at that. He felt sweat come down his brow and a sense of vertigo overtook him when Tony suddenly spoke and he reached out to the window sill to hold himself steady.

"Ahh here comes Natasha, and... Wow. That is one hell of a slit." Bucky glanced towards the door and saw a unfocused Natasha walking towards the balcony with a young woman. Her black hair was held up in a lose twist, many curls escaping their compound, her tan skin was more defined because of the color of her dress. He couldn't see her face yet, but he caught sight of her entire exposed back, the way the muscles underneath moved. He was sure he had never seen such a beautiful back as hers, would it feels as soft as it looked?

...Well, that was a rather unexpected thought.

Bucky began to make his way to open the door for the ladies and found both Clint and Steve walk with him. The door opened and Bucky found his pulse speed a little at the sight of the woman. Her eyes wide and her plump lips parted, as if inhaling. She was beautiful and.. oddly familiar. Natasha began speaking and he tuned out as he began to analyze her. She had scars running up her arms, all of them seemed to have faded and almost disappear. Yet those scars were similar to his, those were war scars, healed quickly but the skin never set right it left a small color distortion that could only be found if you were looking for them. Her body was alert and slightly interested, she was standing a little too still. That could be due to the stress of the night, if this woman had been in middle of a war, a room full of people could make her uncomfortable.

Buckys gaze swept down to her slit where a perfectly tan leg showed it's appearance. Her calf was well defined and her thigh was muscular, not overly big, but precise. Like Natasha, but she had spent her life training, not only in combat but from a little girl she had extent knowledge in Ballet. This woman had been a dancer at some point in her life, which was not a surprise considering her Spaniard nationality.

"-but you can call him Bucky." His attention was brought back to whatever Natasha had said, which seemed as though introductions were being given out.

"Hello, it's so nice to have another girl in the group. There are far too many boys and they enjoy teasing." Wanda said as she brought the young woman into a hug, no discomfort on her face as he had expected there would be.

"Well I'm thrilled to know I won't be the only one. It's a pleasure to meet you all. I hope not to bore." Katarina said with a wink as she nodded to Tony in the back.

"A young woman as alluring as yourself could never be a bore. If anything you've just entered the Lions den." Tony commented as he squeezed by and took her hand to twirl her.

"Tony let her be, you'll scare her off. She's a new agent and deserves to be treated with respect." Steve objected strongly, Katarina only laughed at that while Natasha snorted loudly.

"If anything she'll have all of you a run for your money. She's got a pretty serious resume, possibly has more experience under her belt then Bucky here. Nina is highly trained and highly dangerous, isn't that right?" Natashas speech took Bucky by surprise, he hadn't been paying much attention to the conversation but now he seemed to be interested.

"Well I certainly wouldn't say I'm dangerous unless your in my way I suppose. Memory is a little faulty lately. But I do suppose I can be rather menacing if not fed, or at least that is what my brother would say." Again her laughter seemed to lift everyone's mood and soon more people chuckled as well.

"Where is your brother? I've heard a lot about him, I'd like to meet him." Steve commented as he began to scan the Observatory through the glass windows.

"He's currently sitting in our table, your welcome to find him. He's quite the fan, I believe he'd love to meet you all."

"I can lead you guys back to the table, I think that bartender lost our drinks Nina

I'll be back in a bit." Natasha said as she began to shoo those who wanted to go back to the table out of the balcony. Soon only Bucky and Nina were left outside to stare at the small snow storm building up.

"Sergeant correct? I feel as if we've met somewhere." Ninas voice was softer then when she had addressed the group as a whole. Bucky turned to look at her, a ghost of a smile passed by his features.

"Yes it would be Sergeant, if I used the title, but I prefer Bucky instead. Makes things more.. personal. I don't think we've met, I would remember an encounter with you doll."

"Serg. If I didn't know any better I'd say that comment was more on the flirtatious side." Katarina chuckled as Bucky began to blush lightly. He winked at her and Katarina turned her head slightly to her side to expose her slender neck.

Her scent hit Bucky and the smell of roses and strawberries asulted him. He leaned forward unconsciously to inhale more of her scent when he noticed what appeared to look as a raven tucked behind her right ear with a string of letters at the bottom.

'μακαρία'

His vision suddenly darkened, and his chest began to ache in anticipation. This was going to be bad.

 _The snow had settled over night and the wind died down. The small fire inside the cabin helped warm the floor as he laid next to the burning ambers. His coat was laid over the light blue chair, that had seen better days, to dry from the nights round outaide the cabin. The russian winters were the worst, made him regret saying yes to this ridiculous mission. But saying no was out of the question, they would have washed him again, made him forget everything and start fresh. He was exhausted of not knowing who he was, as if it was an itch he could not scratch. The Winter Soldier was just that, a soldier who took orders and never asked, never felt, never wondered. But now, he remembered some of his kills, he felt their fear, he knew what he was and that he needed to get out fast. Perhaps after this mission he could make a run for it. Go somewhere where they wouldn't look._

 _He stood up, slipped his coat on, grabbed his guns and headed for the door. This would be his last mission and he'd run. The sooner he get it over and done with, the sooner he'd have on the clock to disappear. After all, what was one shield agent compared to all they had._

 _He stepped outside into the snow that covered his entire calf and began to walk east of the cabin while covering his tracks. The agent he was sent to kill was to meet at the cabin in an hour, he needed an impecable view for his target. He began to sweep through the trees and began his search when he heard rustling a few yards ahead of him. He stopped and lifted the sniper towards the sound._

 _There, in a forest green coat stood a figure with the hood covering it's face. This couldn't be the agent he was sent to kill, it had no weapons on its person that he could see, nor did it seem like it was preparing for hamd to hand combat. The Winter Soldier kept his sniper trained on the man._

 _"кто ты? Что ты здесь делаешь?" His voiced boomed over the silence of the early day, and the figure didn't move at all. He just stood there._

 _"я вопрос задала. Ответить или быть убитым." The Winter Soldier said, his voice dripping with a coldness and hatred that couldn't have been distinguished as anything else. He didn't want to shoot this idiotic person, but the lack of response was a making it difficult to find another option._

 _"не стрелять, им ищет человека. Солдат." The figure responded, it's voice was masked, sounded harsh and deep, with a hint of an accent. This person wasn't Russian, but spoke enough to communicate. A soldier. It was looking for a soldier._

 _"почему солдат? кто ты?" He asked the figure, this was wasting his time. He had to set up for his agent to appear and playing 20 questions wasn't going to help. Fuck his control, this person was in his way of both his freedom and his mission_

 _He raised his sniper and aimed at the figures head when the person tentevly lifted it's hands to grasp the hood, and slowly pulled it down._

 _"зима солдат ... Я ищу тебя, кажется, что вы ищете меня. Вы были посланы, чтобы убить меня, я здесь, сделать снимок." He was stunned as her hair tumbled down from her messy braid and she lowered her hands to the side. This woman was his agent and she was looking for him as well._

 _The hesitation on his part was a mistake, he quickly recovered and the sound of his gun went off. The figure stumbled in the snow and soon the forest green coat and messy hair was on the ground. He cautiously approached her, he needed to see if he'd kill her. As soon as his body came near hers, he stared at her face, as if trying to remember her. Blood began to stain the white ground around her and that's when something broke._

 _He remembered his name, and looking at the dead woman made him realize that he was a monster, a selfish one. He fell onto his knees and slowly reached for the body, unzipped her jacket and saw her blouse stained red. He felt for a pulse but couldn't find one. he killed her so he could be free, and he wasn't even sure if this was the agent he was sent to kill he only assumed. His eyes welled up with tears, not realizing why he cried, he simply dragged her body unto his lap and began to sing a russian lullaby. He knew this woman, the memory of her was back._

 _Macaria. He called her Macaria._

 _He had trained her for something, an event. She loved him but they couldn't be together, no one could know otherwise they would kill them. Something happened and she had to leave, their training was over and she had to leave. Perhaps on mission? They loved each other and she became dangerous. Then Hydra wiped him. He forgot about her, but she didnt, she was tracking him._

 _He cried harder into her body and began to shiver from the cold, he gripped her body harder and as he did, he felt a poke. There inside her pant pocket was a pin. The shield pin._

 _He killed his agent, as well as the love of his life_.

...

Translation

1\. кто ты? Что ты здесь делаешь?

Who are you? What are you doing here

2\. я вопрос задала. Ответить или быть убитым.

I asked a question. Reply or be killed.

3.не стрелять, им ищет человека. Солдат.

Do not shoot I am looking for a man. A Soldier.

4."почему солдат? кто ты?

Why soldier? Who are you?

5.зима солдат ... Я ищу тебя, кажется, что вы ищете меня. Вы были посланы, чтобы убить меня, я здесь, сделать снимок.

The winter soldier... i am looking for you, it seems you are looking for me. You were sent to kill me, here i am, take the shot.

... . Authors notes

Ok guys.. first off I want to apologize for the russian, I know it's rusty. Second I really hope you guys like this chapter there's a hell of a lot more and this is the tip of the iceberg. . But I'd love to hear your Comments.. especially if you like my story and it's plot line..

So I'm gonna ask you guys.. that if you like this or are following this story to please please hit the little star button on the bottom left hand corner when your reading.. I just want to know how many are following this story!

I'm excited to hear from you guys.. let me know if you like it!

thank you!

Tushii A.A


	6. Bad Memories and Old Friends

Katarina's P.O.V.

I anticipated the movement, but for some ridiculous reason I still let it happened.

It started slowly, his eyes glazed over and after a few times of calling his name and no answer in return, I figured he was in the middle of an episode. He didn't move a muscle so I took advantage and got a good look at him.

There was no denying how beautiful his big blue eyes where, and the long lashes that would make any vain woman despise him for his luck. They were full and thick, made his irises pop more. He was impressively big and bulky, although his suit hid his body well, the muscles were clearly defined. He had a small scar running down the left side of his forehead and cut into his eyebrow.

Well he certainly didn't look like a 29 year old, he looked older, like your average deadly super soldier would I suspect.

I was a little caught up in the mathematics of his age, when I saw his left eye twitch, that quickly got my attention. After that it was a series of tell signs, jaw flexing, hands curling into fists on the side, heavy breathing, and all I could do was stare at him.

I let his metal hand grasp my neck, let him squeeze my airway, I could hear my blood pumping in my ear. It wasn't an everyday event that someone tries to choke you, but when it happens I usually counter attack. But in this case I let his cool hand squeeze tighter.

I began to let my power manipulate the pain and the panic that was coursing inside me and began to delude it. Afterwards I began to feel for his nervous system, and decided to call his attention another way, given that talking was out of the question.

Soon enough I found the nerves I was looking for, the ones controlling his metal arm and began to tweak his nerves, made it seem like his metal arm was cramping and I increased the pain 100 time fold to make sure he got the message clearly.

That's when my lungs really began to protest, I could delude the pain but not magically give my lungs the air they needed, lucky for me, that's when Bucky decided to let go. The foggy look over his eyes that made them darker started to lift and the blue sparkle was back. His memory episode was over, and now came the hardest part, the copping.

He took an uneasy step back and looked at me, then at his metal hand, and then back at me. The look in his eyes left him vulnerable and the guilt poured out of him, his nerves were suffocating me with his regret and i decided that my invasion was enough. I slowly began to call back my power, so as to not scare him.

After making sure none of my powers essence was left in his body, I cleared my throat and prepared myself for the horrible crock it would make.

"It's alright Bucky. Your safe. This is a safe place."

Working as a psychologist with PTSD patient as your specialty, you tend to get the hang of helping them ease back from an episode. Reality is a bitch and being triggered was possibly the worst thing a person could go through. Reliving their nightmares, not sure who's a threat or where your standing. In the end your patience would give them security and your courage would give them courage, you juat had to help make the transition smoother.

"You are ok Bucky, no harm done." I gave him a soft smile and he only responded with a frown and more staring. This time at my throat.

"I'm. . I-I. ..I'm so sor..rry. I.. I.." His chin was quivering and it broke my heart to see it. I wasn't called into the avenger just because of my super power, I was called in to help Bucky with his memories. It seemed I needed to start ahead of schedule, so I took a step forward and slowly lifted my hand toward his covered metal arm.

"It's alright Bucky, no one's blaming you. It's alright. Do you want to talk about what you saw?" His eyes snapped up to my face and he gave me a quizzical look.

"I understand what it feels like, going through a memory. It's difficult. It doesn't always get easier but I have found that if you talk to someone... well it makes it a bit better. The burden isn't always as heavy when you share it Bucky."

I saw him inhale and I felt proud at being able to pronounce my sentences without letting my spanish tounge get in the way. He parted his lips and exhaled, he was about to respond when I heard the balcony doorknob turn slightly. I looked over my should and sure enough I saw Milo. Damn him, he must have felt something was wrong, twin tuition he would say.

"Sergeant Barnes, it's good to meet you in person, I've heard a few things about you that are.. what is the word you would use? Impresionante at least that is the word in spanish. I just came by to check on Nina that's all. Ceremony is about to start." My brothers cut tone was anything but friendly, or impressed as he said. No, my brother was quite angry, and I'm sure the red handprint on my throat didn't make the greatest first impression. I would need to talk to him after the ceremony.

"Thank you Milo, we'll be on our way." With a slight nod and an intense glare my way he turned and walked out. I watch him approach the table and waited for him to begin talking to someone before I turned and took in Buckys pale face.

"Well let's get going to our table before they send someone else in for us." Bucky gave a flinch as I moved, but said nothing as he followed me out toward the table. I would definitely need to talk to him before the night is over. I sat next to my brother who saved a seat specifically for me and after a round of applause for the first spokesman, my brother leaned forward.

"Qué te hizo ese hombre. Se que te tuvo del cuello, mi pregunta, hermanita, es porque no te defendiates?"

My brothers angry tone was soft enough for anyone who wanted to eavesdrop, but I felt the weight of the reprimand none the less. Even though he was worried, he could be quite the ass.

"No fue su culpa Milo. Lo agarre en el medio de una memoria y al parecer fue un poco agresivo. No hice daño. Todo esta bien, entonces no lo hagas sentir peor de lo que ya se siente. Porfavor hermano."

All I got as a response was to go take a look at my neck, so I quietly excused myself and headed towards the ladies room.

I quickly locked myself in and went to the floor length mirror that took up the entire wall behind the door. I couldn't blame my brother for being more then a little upset, a large handprint wrapped itself around my neck, the fingertips already beginning to bruise. The yellow and purple swirls stood out of my tan skin, this was much more noticable then what I expected.

But, the more I stared at my throat, the more curious I got as to what triggered the agressive move. The memory of his cold metal hand was bursting through my mind, he was really strong. My eyes traveled up to my face in time to see a blush creep onto my cheeks, at the sight of myself I only blushed harder. I needed to cool down, I went to the sink to wet my hands and patted my cheeks down. The coolness felt so good and once I knew the blush had disappeared I took a final look over myself , readjusted some of my lose curls to cover some of my neck and opened the door to step out. Only to be pulled aside by a tall blond man.

"Katarina, it is wonderful to see you again." His eyes were a bright blue and his hair was to his shoulders but pinned half way up. He looked nothing like the God I knew.

"Thor!"

"Your ok Bucky, no harm done." I gave him a soft smile and he only returned with a frown and more staring. This time at my throat.

"I'm. . I-I. ..I'm so sor..rry. I.. l.." His chin was quivering and it broke my heart to see it. I wasn't called into the avenger just because of my super power, I was called in to help Bucky with his memories. It seemed I needed to start ahead of schedule, so I took a step forward and slowly lifted my hand toward his covered metal arm.

"It's alright Bucky, no one's blaming you. It's alright. Do you want to talk about what you saw?" His eyes snapped up to my face and he gave me a quizzical look.

"I understand what it feels like, going through a memory, it's difficult. It doesn't always get easier but I have found that if you talk to someone, well it makes it a bit better. The burden isn't always as heavy when you share it Bucky."

I saw him inhale and I felt proud at being able to pronounce my sentences without letting my spanish tounge get in the way. He parted his lips and exhaled, he was about to respond when I heard the balcony doorknob turn slightly. I looked over my should and sure enough I saw Milo. Damn him, he must have felt something was wrong, twin tuition he would say.

"Sergeant Barnes, it's good to meet you in person, I've heard a few things about you that are.. what is the word you would use? _Impresionante_ at least that is the word in spanish. I just came by to check on Nina that's all. Ceremony is about to start." My brothers cut tone was anything but friendly, or impressed as he said. No, my brother was quite angry, and I'm sure the red handprint on my throat didn't make the greatest first impression. I would need to talk to him after the ceremony.

"Thank you Milo, we'll be on our way." With a slight nod and an intense glare my way he turned and walked out. I watch him approach the table and waited for him to begin talking to someone before I turned and took in Buckys pale face.

"Well let's get going to our table before they send seine else in for us." Bucky gave a flinch as I moved, but said nothing as he followed me out toward the table. I would definitely need to talk to him before the night is over. I sat next to my brother who saved a seat specifically for me and after a round of applause for the first spokesman, my brother leaned forward.

"Qué te hizo ese hombre. Se que te tuvo del cuello, mi pregunta, hermanita, es porque no te defendiates?"

My brothers angry tone was soft enough for anyone who wanted to eavesdrop, but I felt the reprimand none the less. Even though he was worried, he could be quite the ass.

"No fue su culpa Milo. Lo agarre en el medio de una memoria y al parecer fue un poco agresivo. No hice daño. Todo esta bien, entonces no lo hagas sentir peor de lo que ya se siente. Porfavor hermano."

All I got as a response was to go take a look at my neck, so I quietly excused myself and headed towards the ladies room.

I quickly locked myself in and went to the floor length mirror that took up the entire wall behind the door. I couldn't blame brother for being more then a little upset, a large handprint wrapped itself around my neck, the fingertips already beginning to bruise. The yellow and purple swirls stood out of my tan skin, this was much more noticable then what I expected.

But, the more I stared at my throat, the more curious I got as to what triggered such an agressive move. The memory of his cold metal hand was bursting through my mind, he was really strong. My eyes traveled up to my face in time to see a blush creep onto my cheeks, at the sight of myself I only blushed harder. I needed to cool down, I went to the sink to wet my hands and patted my cheeks down. The coolness felt so good and once I knew the blush had disappeared I took a final look over myself , readjusted some of my lose curls to cover some of my neck and opened the door to step out. Only to be pulled aside by a tall blond man that wrapped extremly muscular arms around me.

"Miss Katarina, it is wonderful to see you again." His eyes were a bright blue and his hair was to his shoulders but pinned half way up. He looked nothing like the God I met years ago.

"Thor!"

...

Translation

1\. "Qué te hizo ese hombre. Se que te tuvo del cuello, mi pregunta, hermanita, es porque no te defendiates?"

What did that man do. I know he had you at the throat, my question, little sister, us why you didn't defend yourself.

fue su culpa Milo. Lo agarre en el medio de una memoria y al parecer fue un poco agresivo. No hice daño. Todo esta bien, entonces no lo hagas sentir peor de lo que ya se siente. Porfavor hermano."

It wasn't his fault Milo. I caught him in the middle of a memory and apparently it was a bit agressive. He did no harm. Everything is fine so please don't make him feel worse for it. Please brother.


	7. Seduction and Something Else

Buckys P.O.V

My stomach dropped again at the memory of her facial features as I choked her. I have no idea what she was saying after I let go, the blood pumping in my ears hadn't died down yet.

After her brothers cold introduction and his subtle glare I followed Nina out. I had just made a turn for the worst, she on the other hand was calm and collected on the outside. My thoughts turned to what she really felt, was it disgust, anger... fear? I have always been feared, at least that's the impression I've received in my memories, never the less I didn't like the dry aftertaste of it.

I held my gaze to my plate until I heard soft whispers, I looked up in time to see her brother gently nod his head towards her neck. The horror intensified as I saw my hand print softly caressing her neck, I could see where my fingertips squeezed as bruising began to form there.

I had never laid a hand on a woman - well, not when I was in charge of my actions at least- yet staring at her exposed neck, the outline of her clavicles, it made me feel sick.

I saw her stand and walk towards the Ladies room, no doubt to inspect the damage I had caused. I would need to apologize to her brother soon, and to her as well.. again.

I stared at the table again and found myself drifting towards my new memory. What in the hell was that about?

Who was that woman?

No, I knew who she was, an agent of shield, and judging by her clothes it seemed it was a few years after Hydra won the fight against me. I have never had a memory of a woman before, of my kills yes, but never of a woman whom I held a conversation.

Well... if you can call that a conversation, but... she knew me. She was looking for me and I killed her. She was my mission and I killed her. Instead now I have more questions about her and my past, perhaps i could ask Tony for help.

Things with Tony have been rocky but lately he's been more... patient with me. After being under house arrest for 8 months and being under numerous treatments for my... condition. There seemed to have been a bound born out of his anguish and my fear of being controlled. Granted after all that Tony still wasn't able to find a way to help me resist those trigger words, but now I was able to hold off longer before turning into an obedient little soldier. As well as snapping back out of that damn trance, little by little I was able to control myself better, fight it off and come back sooner. Unfortunately the side affects were being harassed by memories, one right after the other. They never made any sense and the years seemed to be scrambled. Steve was able to help me create a time line which soon Tony found it his duty to take over.

But the teasing on his end increased and I figured that was an optimistic sign that things are going good. I'll ask Tony tomorrow to see if he has access to any file of Shields after 1950.

"Bucky are you alright?" My head snapped up to catch Natasha staring at me expectantly.

"Of course Talia." I gave my best smile and felt phony while doing so. I looked around the table to see everyone paying attention to anything but the main speaker. I figured I should be listening until a chill ran up my spine. I looked around and caught Nina's brother looking my way. All of a sudden I felt a small haze come over my mind, and the panic began, it felt like a memory was about to make its way, but then, nothing happened and the haze was there, as if I could touch it if I reached out.

 _I know you hurt my sister, and I am aware it was unintentional, but touch her again and the pain and fear from being assulted by your memories will be a walk in the park compared to what I will do to you. Fair warning._

Milenko's voice rattled around in my head and I had to stop myself from jumping a mile high as I heard it. He didn't sound as angry as he looked-

 _I am not angry, I understand those reactions, more so than you could understand. But I will always watch out for my sister. She means a lot to me, and although I know she can take care of herself, it is also your safety I am looking out for._

 _ **Milenko, I understand. I do want to apologize to you, I meant her no harm and I am afraid those marks will take a few days to fade. I regretfully sorry for touching her. It won't happen again.**_

 _For your sake, I hope so. Katarina may seem calm on the outside, but inside she is a spitfire. Just don't tell her I told you so._

I couldn't help myself and chuckled at his words, i reached for my drink and took a sip only to choke on it afterwards.

A memory that was clearly not my own played out of a very angry Katarina standing in a door frame with a wooden spoon on fire in one hand and in the other a sandle?..yelling in a rapid spanish that sounded more like she was singing then giving whoever an earful. Her hair in a lopsided bun falling apart and what looked like powder covering her blue shorts and black shirt, flour. It was flour, behind her a black cloud of smoke and an insesent smoke alarm blaring with all its force that was drowned out by Katarina's yelling. The person, which I assumed was Milenko made the mistake to laugh out loud and the last thing I saw was the sandle being thrown towards my face.

As quickly as the memory had come, it had left and I was back at staring at Milenko who sat back on his chair, a smirk gracing his features.

 _That sandle left a mark on my forehead for a a few days, I heard all type of tire track remarks and feminism jokes after that. Like I said, spitfire._

 _ **It seems she is. I do feel horrible for what I did, I**_ -

 _Let it go, I know how bad you feel, I can sense it, the same way I can get into your mind. Let's call it being even, the day she turns on you I won't defend you, I'll only fuel the humiliation more. Esta bien?_

 _ **Ok, thank you.**_

I waited for a replay and found that the haze that came over my head cleared and Milenko's attention was taken by Natasha. The fancy watch Sam gave me for Christmas made a soft noise and I realized it was 20:30, the night had passed by quickly and my bed kept calling for me . This day had turned out worse then I had previously anticipated and the alcoholic drink before me barley scratched the itch I was feeling. If only the super serum had allowed me to get properly drunk.

I stood up and headed towards the open bar for something russian, after quickly ordering my drink and sitting down I felt a small hand delicately land on my left arm, in the crook of my elbow.

A fairly young and beautiful blond woman sat beside me.

"I'm sorry Mr. Barnes, I hope this seat isn't taken, but I saw you walking over here and I couldn't help myself. My name is Moira Lengton and I have had my eye on you all night." Her bright red lips curved upwards into a smirk, her eyes gleamed with mischief and her touch suddenly became too intimate for the norms of a introduction. I shift in my chair, feeling a little more confident and smiled back.

"Is that so Miss. Lengton? Why is that?" My voice lowered itself as I spoke to her, making her lean forward, her bright blue eyes locking with mine, her breast slightly brushing my metal covered arm. It seemed as though the old Bucky was peaking out from beneath all the pain and self loathing. A flash of pride swept through me, woman used to flaunt themselves in front of me, they enjoyed my attention. Just as I enjoyed giving it to them, I was a ladies man. A long time ago, maybe, but at this moment with this seductive woman in front of me, I felt a shift in my person. I used to be an overly confident man.

"Well for starters you are quite the looker Mr. Barnes, and I do enjoy the company of good looking men, especially ones that don't mind being forward and don't mind ordering a scotch for me."

She winked at me and leaned more on my arm, her hand that was previously inside the crook of my elbow, abandoning it's warmth and landing squarely on the inside of my black jacket, on my left pectoral. Her chest sliding up my arm as I felt her warm breath next to my ear, ready to give me a secret, like the vixen she was.

"A scotch we could enjoy elsewhere, perhaps in the company of your bedroom, Mr. Barnes."

...

Katarina P.O.V.

"Thor!"

I felt myself being lifted high in the air in a tight embrace of rippling muscles.

"Thor it's so good to see you! Dios mio! What are you doing in New York, I thought you left to Asgard. How is Jane? And Darcy, I've missed them so much!"

He lowered me to the floor with more carefulness then what he used to pick me up. I looked up at his joyful face and the memory of the first time I met him came flooding back.

After a few anxiety attacks and a strong depression hit during my work in the New York State Psychiatric Institute, my boss decided to force me into taking a month off. The pain of losing a very close patient was too much of a loss in my life and the guilt I felt for not being able to do more drove me to a bad drinking habit and panic attacks through out the day. Matt had counseled me to take all of my PTO at once, which amounted to three months worth of paid time off, but after driving a hard negotiation and blackmailing on my part, he resigned to letting me come back to work after only a month. Said I took my job too seriously and had forgone my social life. So, after receiving a boot to the ass and a get better soon basket by my colleges, I booked a plane to New Mexico to visit my old friends, Jane and Darcy. I had been spending time with them, tinkering around and cracking jokes like the good old days where life was free of responsibilities. Before Jane became an astrophysic and way before I decided to go into psychology and Neuro science with my brother. Things were quite for what my life consisted of back in New York, but of course that was before we found Thor and went into an illegal adventure that had our adrenaline spiked and Jane's love interest became mine and Darcy's main concern, among other things.

But that time with all of them, Thor, Dr. Erik, it was exactly the vacation I needed. Thor and I became close, while he asked for advise on Jane, I asked him questions about his culture and history back home. Soon our bond felt more like family then anything else. It was such a painful goodbye when he left, and I stayed around for a few more weeks afterwards. Jane was a sweet girl with a mean right hook, but she needed us, and suddenly I remembered what it felt like to be needed for someone with normal problems. Love problems.

Of course once I left with Jane's promise to visit me in New York and Darcy sending me constant emails with suitable bachelor's, I began to wonder if Thor would ever come back to Jane. After hearing about his return from Dr. Erik and a excited two hour long phone call from Darce, I was happy to hear Thor was doing alright.

But seeing him here, in front of me, it was something out of this world!

"They are both as good as any should be. I must apologize Miss. Katarina, when last I was here, I did not spare time to visit you in New York. I am sure-"

"Ooh stop that you old Toff, I know saving the world is a taxing job. It says so in the fine print." I winked at him which only made him chuckle deeply, he stretched his arms and put his massive hands on my shoulders, making me feel puiny.

"You look beautiful my spanish warrior. Have you found yourself a mate yet? There are plenty of men in Asgard that would be honored to take care of you in marriage. I took Jane to Asgard, she enjoyed herself much during her trip. Perhaps one of my brothers in arms. They would never dare anger you, and to that extent me."

I laughed at this, since the first time I met Thor he was constantly looking after me, worried that I would never find a man worthy of me. He was as bad as Milenko on his best days.

"Thor, I'm fine. A man right now would only ruin my fun, not add to it."

He smiled tenderly at me and grabbed my hand, patted it with a look in his eyes of concealed sadness.

"I know we men can be difficult in the understanding of woman. Many a times I find myself lost with Jane and her wit. But my little spanish warrior I am concerned for you. I.. there is.. something I have not been able to tell you and now is not the time for such stories but, promise me that in two days we can talk."

"What are-"

"No, I can not explain here. It is not the right time, promise me that we may talk in two days. Away from prying ears. Do you promise?"

I sighed loudly, since the day I told him my name and my origin, he had always been protective of me. Now he tells me there is something I need to know, only to increase my curiosity, and not sate it was cruel but what else could I do. It wasn't like I could wrestle an answer out of him, nor use any sort of manipulation. Jane could, but I couldnt.

"Alright Mr. Secretive-hold-the-bait-in-front-of-a-curious-woman God, almighty Thor. Two days. And so help you if you change the date to later, you'll deal with my wrath which is much more spicy then Jane's wrath. You have been warned."

He laughed deeply at that and tucked my hand underneath his elbow as we stepped out.

"It seems the honored speaker is done and I am to assume there is a dance on its way?"

He moved me towards the center of the room where people began to slowly get up from their seats, some heading out to congratulate the guest speakers, while other began to gossip among themselves. Suddenly slow music began to play and I saw a few couples on the dance floor with us.

Thor kept his distance and we spoke about the latest news on Asgard, and soon I felt myself tuning him out as I caught a glance around his massive shoulder. A vibrant blond woman was sitting at the bar, heavily leaning on Bucky and he seemed to be enjoying it.

That's when a soft pain began to shift inside my chest, the pit of my stomach seemed empty yet filled with a crawling sensation. Something about that woman was throwing my senses off.

Thor decided it was time to spin me and shift our stance closer to the bar, which gave me a better view of this woman. She wore a tightly fitted, blue dress that flared out at the knees and covered her no doubt high heels. Her right hand held onto a small clutch bag and her left hand looked as if it was tucked away inside Buckys open jacket. Her hair was piled neatly atop her head and a small tattoo was visible at the nape of her neck, a tattoo of a key hole?

Thor suddenly spinned me again and gave me a soft dip. Afterwards he stepped back and clapped along with everyone else, the dance had ended and he bent down to give me a soft kiss on the top of my head and he turned me around to face a blushing Steve Rogers.


End file.
